According to multiple sources (MSNBC) (Wyoming Tribune, redirected from the AP) Gov. Sarah Palin will be stepping down within the next few weeks.

WASILLA, Alaska (AP) — Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin says she will resign from office July 26.
Her spokesman wouldn’t say why Palin decided to step down, but the announcement stirred speculation that she would focus on a bid for the 2012 Republican nomination for president.

Being a bit of a headline-first-story-later news maven, my initial reaction was something like, “oh god, we’ve finally pushed this woman over the edge.”

An anecdote: There was this girl in my freshman English class, back in high school. She sticks in my mind as being spoiled and stupid because of one answer she gave in class. One. Several people in class were having a hard time identifying with Maya Angelou’s I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings. Our teacher asked us to imagine what it might be like to so openly share with an audience the most horrible experience of our lives. Some people in the room spoke about siblings dying or parents getting divorced, and this girl said, the worst thing that ever happened to her was when her father sold her pony (aside: who the hell really has a pony?). Word spread through the whole school within the week, and every move this girl made for the next six months was picked apart with the kind of cruelty that only fifteen year old girls can create. Junior year, one of my friends mentioned the pony story, and someone asked,
“Whatever happened to that girl?”
“She got all sad because everyone was picking on her. She changed schools or something.”
“Oh whatever. Who does that?”

The heartless teenager in me wanted this to be Palin’s story. The tax paying voter in me is terrified by that running for president bit. It is terrible, but I want Palin to fade in to memory. I am sick of seeing her face and her kids and hearing all of her stupid sound bites. However, as much as journalists resemble nit-picking schoolgirls, some politicians have moved beyond those kinds of games. Make no mistake, I don’t think Gov. Palin is as oblivious as everyone (i.e. myself) has made her out to be. I imagine she will be moved to some underground bunker to be groomed in to the SuperPresidentMom the GOP wanted her to be in 2007. I think of this, because that girl from high school is now married and helps run a successful family business.

Hell hath no fury, people. Watch out.

“Again, I didn’t cross the sex line. I went past the line… I’m quite certain that there were a handful of instances wherein I crossed lines I shouldn’t have crossed as a married man but never crossed the ultimate line.”

The above quote is from Gov. Mark Sanford, speaking candidly about his extramarital affair. But, in the style of most Americans, not quite candidly enough. So, what, they went to dinner and a movie? Cuddled on the couch? In his own words, Sanford described the tryst as, “a whole lot more than a simple affair… it’s a love story.” Did they dance by moonlight and look knowingly into each other’s eyes, kissing for only the briefest of moments before turning away. Were they, like Francesca and Paolo, seduced by reading the story of Lancelot and Guinevere, damning themselves forever to the second ring of Dante’s Hell? Inquiring minds, people!

The new angle, of course, is that Gov. Sanford may have been unfaithful, but he didn’t really cheat. Much like when Former Pres. Clinton claimed that oral sex wasn’t really “sex,” there seems to be some crucial barrier in the American psyche between intercourse, and every other possible thing. I refuse to allow my general distaste for Sanford to cloud my belief that a politician’s personal life is none of my business. I will criticize him for abandoning his post and coercing his assistants to lie for him, but I know just as well as everyone else that one can truly believe in family values and good Christian ethics and still screw up in a massive and very public way. My biggest worry is that these figure heads of abstinence-only education are really kind of missing the point.

Abstinence, as it was taught in my Catholic school by Sister Mary Trisha, does not mean just abstaining from penetrating heterosexual intercourse. It means choosing to avoid all temptations, even kissing with an open mouth. Everything that gave you any kind of erotic pleasure was sex, and experiencing that feeling with anyone other than your spouse (even if you were alone) was a sin. The only birth control we needed was a buttoned up sweater, as nothing should be progressing so far as to require crossing our legs. There was no fuzzy line at Our Lady of Mercy, where holding hands in the hallway could get you detention.

What is the great difference between flying halfway around the globe to meet a woman for coffee, a woman you admit to having great feelings for and whom your wife has expressly told you not to visit, and going to have sex with the same woman? Is one a greater betrayal than the other? Say you did go there to have sex, you were both naked, but it never progressed to intercourse. Does that make any real difference? For Sanford, the “ultimate line” is her bikini line, not the ticket line at the airport. A study from The Kinsey Institute, “based on a 1991 survey of 599 college students, found that women in general were less likely than men to consider oral sex or mutual masturbation as having ‘had sex.’ Of the women, 37 percent considered oral sex as, well, sex. Forty-four percent of men did. A second survey in 1996 asked ‘Is oral sex “real” sex?’ About 52 percent of the men said yes, but only 46 percent of women did.” (AP) There has got to be some connection between this cult of virginity (hey, if oral sex isn’t sex you can blow every guy in the state and still be pure) and the rise of a mutant strain of drug resistant gonorrhea (for real). It is, really and truly, none of my business what Gov. Sanford did or did not do in Argentina, but since he chose to volunteer this information to us, I’ve just got to say I’m disappointed. He may have done everything else buy have sex with this woman, but for all the trouble it’s caused him, he might as well have.

I’m back in the OKC.

I havent slept more than two hours at a time in the past 4-5 days. Thus, I’m fucking exhausted.

But I will say this- if given the chance, I would go back in a heartbeat. It was wonderful.

Out.

Yeah that’s right, a Cessna landed on 130 today.

Here is the information from KXAN’s site:

The Weekend Week’s End Wrap Up for June 21 through 27 is brought to you by one serious news story and a cavalcade of tabloid gold!

Sunday: Vote tampering has been confirmed in the Irania election. Chatham House, a London based research organization, “showed that in two provinces where Mr. Ahmadinejad won a week ago, a turnout of more than 100 percent was recorded.” (NYT) Also, check the list of journalists and politicians arrested in Iran and support however you can. http://tehranbureau.com/list-imprisoned-iranian-journalists-politicians/

Monday: Jon and Kate are getting divorced. Their one hour super special special episode special featured the kids getting playhouses (one was a haunted house, it was badass) and Kate picking a fight over where to put the playhouses. Also, Jon had both of his ears pierced and then the final half hour was just Kate pretending to cry in solo couch interviews. I have traveled to mid-state Pennsylvania to try and get a one on one interview with Jon (but mostly to visit you, Mom). I arrived in State College just in time to see Jon buy a round of flaming Dr. Pepper’s for the girls of Alpha Phi and toast to freedom. No joke. Spread the word.

Tuesday: A conservative off shoot of Simon and Schuster (I don’t know either) has offered Former VP Richard B. Cheney a chance to write his memoirs of his life in politics. I guess it makes sense, the only vice president to ever make any sort of impact whatsoever should probably get another word in. (“We will, in fact, be greeted as liberators.”) Or maybe not….

Wednesday: Until recently, I never had much reason to prefer Georgia to South Carolina. The roads are terrible in both states, it’s hot as hell everywhere, and both have peaches (SC has more, GA’s are better). However, Sonny Perdue never abandoned the state to fark someone halfway around the world. Thank you, Governor Mark Sanford! One thing: I do not believe the tears in your apology. The flight to Argentina is long. It’s really long. You had plenty of time to think of how much of a bad decision this was going to be. Also, who spends five days “crying in Argentina?” Who are you, Evita?

Thursday: Are you kidding, nothing at all happened on Thursday. Most boring news day in history. (RIP Farrah, MJ)

Friday: Oh, right, Michael Jackson died. Nothing happened on Friday either. Lots of people crying, some prisoners danced to Thriller. Watch the video here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o)

Saturday: Saturday I sat on my uncle’s couch, played crossword puzzles, and read comic books, so I have no idea what happened. The answer 14 across was “Sidewinder.” The two-part two time US Open winner (7 down, 10 across) was Ernie Els. Hey, did the US beat Spain in soccer?

This morning when turning on to the street that my work place is on I heard a “pop”.  When I pulled into the parking lot, I heard the hissing sound.  Yep, a fairly fast leak.  I quickly hopped back into my 4runner and drove right up the road to the Discount Tire only to find this:

In my tire.  And of course no road hazard on the used 4runner I just bought plus the fact that its past 30 days since I bought the 4runner so the dealer washes its hands clean…

This may be a cold, callous thing to say when the body has barely started to cool, but when the person is someone who got all molesty and junk on a child cancer patient and avoided jail simply because he could afford to buy the family off?

Good riddance. Your family and others may grieve, and they have the right to. From myself (and I know of at least one other person on the site who would agree with this), I say this…

Rot in hell, you sick fuck.

Out.

5:50 pm Eastern:

Michael Jackson has been taken to a hospital in Los Angeles after paramedics responded to a 911 call at his home. He was reported in cardiac arrest. Jackson was not breathing when they arrived. Paramedics attempted to revive him.

TMZ says he’s dead (here): don’t trust ‘em. They jump the gun on everything and fake apologize later.

MSNBC says not yet (here).

I’m watching Wolf Blitzer report on CNN, and he’s choosing his words very carefully. No one inside the hospital is reporting anything, and family members are en route.

I’m holding out hope, because I have to. He was strange, very strange, but he was (is) the King of Pop.

Long may he reign.

I’ll keep you posted.

—-

6:24 pm Eastern: from MSNBC.com

Official reports claim Jackson is in a coma.

“Los Angeles Fire Department Capt. Steve Ruda told the newspaper that Jackson was not breathing when paramedics arrived at his home and CPR was performed.

The pop star’s immediate condition is not known, but TMZ.com is reporting that he may have suffered cardiac arrest.”

—

6:26 pm Eastern: from MSNBC.com

“The Los Angeles Times reports that Michael Jackson has died at age 50 after being rushed to UCLA Medical Center.”

—

6:29 pm Eastern:from MSNBC.com

“[Michael Jackson's] lifetime record sales tally is believed to be around 750 million, which, added to the 13 Grammy Awards he received, makes him one of the most successful entertainers of all time.”

—

7:00 pm Eastern:

CNN reports: The LA Coroner’s Office confirms that Michael Jackson has died.

August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009

—

he came into your apartment
he left the bloodstains on the carpet
then you ran into the bedroom
you were struck down
it was your doom

annie are you ok
so, annie are you ok
are you ok annie

Uhm, Mahmoud?

A little tip. When trying to mollify a growing discontent and attempts at revolution, showing your people a three movie marathon built around a small group of people fighting insurmountable odds to defeat a monstrous ruler and winning might not be the best of choices.

Just Sayin’.

Out.

Two television icons, one week.

The first was a bonafide hero, serving in two wars for his country. He then followed it up with 50 years of being in our homes, serving 30 of them next to a legend.

The other was an icon in her own right, being the face (and body) that defined sex for a generation (or two) of men from the 1970s and 80s. Not only was she a sex symbol, but she could also perform as an actress better than many. She earned several Emmy nominations over the years and was well-respected, even when she played the “ditzy blonde” to the hilt.

A tribute to two television icons, for whom the broadcast waves are a little less funny for their loss.

Out.

I leave here in 3 days.

In and of itself, I suppose it’s time. I’m ready to get home, and yet I don’t want to leave either. I’ve enjoyed my time here immensely. I’ve met some new friends, been to wonderful places, enjoyed excellent food and in general had a blast.

I return home Monday morning, landing in The OKC Monday evening (thanks to the way time works with return flights). I go back to work Wednesday night, working through the 4th. I’d have liked to have a little vacation before starting up again, but that won’t be possible.

I’ll post one last time before I leave, but until then I have a day and a half left in the office here and a weekend to prep for return.

Truly, not enough time.

One last note- for Chrissakes, can we please return to some comedy on the site every once and a while? My lord, I leave the country for two months and everyone gets all serious and junk.

In fact, I feel the need to do something goofy and foolish just to change the tone a bit.

(pfffffft)

Right there? Just farted.

Now, TELL ME that doesn’t make you giggle a little bit.

Out.

How do you feel about filling out the 2010 Census and handing that over to a previously convicted felon who has served time for fraud?  That’s what they are planning.  Remember, President Obama wants to move the Census under the White House.  And who helped Obama get elected? ACORN.
But what is on the Census? What type of information will you be giving?  The Constitution only requires you give them the number of people in your household but the “revised laws” state you have to fill this entire form out with the increasingly personal questions.  You can see the sample form here.  But I’ll put down some of the questions below to give you an example:

Last Name, First Name, Sex, Age, DOB, Names of EVERY person in the house and DOBs. How each person is related to the above, Race.  Does each person sometimes live or stay somewhere else?  Is your residence a mobile home apartment or home? Do you own it, have a loan mortgage on it? What’s your telephone number?

But that form is a basic form.  There is a more in depth form here. that the Census workers will be collecting.

Marital Status, Fertility, Grandparents as Caregivers, Ancestry, Place of Birth, Language Spoken at Home, Educational Enrollment, Level of Education completed, where did you live last year? Disability,  Income, Food Stamps, Place of Work (Employment), How do you get to work (car, van, bus, train, taxi, walk, work at home), how many people ride with you, what time do you leave for work and how long did it take you to get there, how many vehicles does the household have, year house was built, how many rooms in house,  how many are bedrooms,  kitchen and facilities (running water, toilet, bathtub/shower, sink, stove, range, fridge, telephone), heating the house (gas/electric), value of house, cost of rent/mortgage, bills, Health Insurance coverage…etc.

Yeah, I find this a bit more personal – and beside the questions they have notes that say “asked since 1960″ or “asked since 1880″ etc.  But the thing is – the “section” may have been asked since 1960 but the questions under the section have been updated to include more information.

So given the above questions, do you feel comfortable answering them to a person who potentially has helped commit voter fraud or has been convicted of a felony in the past?

Today ABC is getting exclusive time to interview him at the White House, including a 2 hour staged town hall style meeting where people are, if they see fit, able to ask the tough dissenting questions about our healthcare.  I wonder if someone will ask that question about why our President has stated it would be 1 trillion dollars to fund it but the Congressional Budget Office is showing it’s more like 2 trillion.

Is it just me or does anyone else feel a bit strange with the fact that we don’t have any other media outlets, especially ones that don’t faun all over our President?  I knew the propoganda machine was good but wow, this is a whole new ballpark.

This morning Diane Sawyer got an exculsive interview with the President.

DIANE SAWYER: Do you still expect to get health care by the end of the year?
PRESIDENT OBAMA: Yes.

SAWYER: Absolutely?

OBAMA: Absolutely.

SAWYER: If you don’t, is it over for four years?

OBAMA: We’re going get it done. So, I won’t engage in hypotheticals in which we don’t. And the reason its going get done is because the American People understand it has to get done…..

Wow, really is that the toughest questions you got for him? Seriously? What happened to real journalism?  Then there is this gem in her questions:

SAWYER: Ninety-five percent– you said today. See, I’m shameless on asking the human interest questions. But–

OBAMA: Yeah, I– well, I– this is– a favorite for every reporter. So, the– you know, I– I’ve answered it as often as I can. I’m sure I will continue to answer it.

SAWYER: But is there a time of day that’s the hardest?

OBAMA: Diane–

SAWYER: Most people find–

OBAMA: –you know, I think– I’ve answered that one.

SAWYER: I think people wonder– at the end of the day, should we all be assuming personal responsibility in a different way. And should there, in fact, be some cost to all of us if we don’t take care of ourselves. Or this new, “We’re all in this together.” We’re–

OBAMA: I think everybody does have responsibilities. And– I think that you’re seeing most employers– who provide health insurance starting to think about how can they ramp up wellness– programs for their employees. One of the things that Michelle and I working diligently on is how can we– engage– kids to start– healthy habits. And– you know, and– I think everybody understands that– perfection is not the goal. But moving in the right direction is.

SAWYER: Thank you so much.

Yes.. thanks for that.. really.

For non 3gs phones only you can now jailbreak your iphone. Check it out http://blog.iphone-dev.org/post/128573459/ultras-now . Ultrasn0w also lets you jump carriers.