Seriously. I’m really tired of you people. I know how you got your jobs. You kissed a lot of ass and know how to delegate people and throw the wool over upper managements eyes. I will no longer give you any help or suggestions about “what would I do if I was in your situation?” My answer is “You will need to figure that one out because you make 4 times what I make so you should be 4 times as knowledgeable on the subject.”

When my co-worker calls you ahead of time to tell you what we expect to be done before we get there, don’t say “Yeah, yeah, I’m an admin I know what needs to be done.” Then when we get there, you only prove to us that you have absolutely no idea what needs to be done, compounded by the fact that you are 145 miles away.

When I get onsite and have to call you to fix your network because all of the workstations you installed have IP conflicts, don’t tell me that you’ll have to research the issue and get back to me.

When you tell the office manager that their office is COMPLETELY secure, why not make sure that you change the CHEAP Linksys Router password to something other than admin. By the way, there is a reason Cisco bought Linksys. They wanted to get into the HOME market. CISCO is for the office, Linksys for the Home. Say it with me now.

Don’t tell me that you can remote in and then ask me what port you need to open on the router so that you can get RDP to work.

When I explain that you need to set your DNS to internal and setup WINS, don’t again tell me that you need to research it, and then come up with the idea that DNS came out of a movie made by Quentin Tarantino.

Don’t ask me what suggestions I have for resolving your network issues then turn around and patronize me by telling me that you’ve been a systems admin for the school board for quite some time then ask me if I know how to create a group for group policy in Active Directory. Oh and asking how old I am? That’s the best way for me to give you a beating for every year I’ve been doing this. Since I was BORN you dumbshit. I came out of the womb with a computer attached to the hip.

Big Suprise here… a movie about gang violence….
50 Cent Movie Pulled After Pa. Shooting
AP (11-10) 18:18 PST Homestead, Pa. (AP) –

The new 50 Cent movie “Get Rich or Die Tryin’” has been pulled from a theater where a man was fatally shot even though officials said Thursday they do not know whether the film was a factor in the slaying.

Loews Corp. decided to stop showing the rapper’s bullet-ridden bio while the investigation is going on, said John McCauley, the company’s vice president of marketing.

“We’re unclear whether there is a direct connection,” McCauley said.

He said the company is doing all it can to make sure patrons are safe at the 22-screen multiplex in a popular entertainment-and-shopping complex just east of Pittsburgh.

Shelton Flowers, 30, had just watched the rapper’s movie Wednesday when he got into a confrontation with three men in the bathroom. A fight ensued and spilled out into the concessions area, where Flowers was shot, police said.

Authorities were looking for witnesses, and no suspects were immediately arrested.

Nemmie’s theme for the month. Prose before Hos. She’s also sworn off dating. Ha!

NASA space station turns 5 (yesturday).

School Girl in Japan blogged about how she was poisoning her mother. (via blogebrity)

Via the Register Dell keeping job cuts hush hush…

Dell stays mum on job cuts
Speaks in smoky riddles
Dell is poised for its biggest job-slashing program for four years, according to reports.

A Register reader got in touch to tell us he had heard that 180 jobs will go in the UK and Ireland but staff were still in the dark.
Dell UK is unwilling to talk about job cuts blaming the “quiet period” before the desktop giant posts financial results. But company spokespeople in the US have confirmed that job cuts are likely to be the most significant since 2001 when Dell laid off 5,700 people.

A spokeswoman for Dell UK was only able to say: “It is true we are enhancing the structure and distribution of work.” Asked by a confused Register if this meant job cuts she confirmed that: “Adjustments to our business include job cuts.”

Texan paper the Austin American-Statesman said hundreds of Dell workers were laid off on Friday. A Dell spokesman would not give figures but told the paper the layoffs were the largest since 2001 when the firm got rid of almost one in four US workers. Dell employs some 18,000 people in Austin and Waco.

The paper said the cuts were due to a reorganisation of Dell’s consumer division. It reports that senior staff were among those clearing their desks.

The full story is here.

Speculation continues on employee forum ihatedell.net - have a look here.®

Here’s the Statesman article:

Hundreds of workers laid off

Unspecified number of job cuts are most in Central Texas since 2001 tech bust.

By Dan Zehr
AMERICAN-STATESMAN STAFF
Saturday, October 29, 2005

Dell Inc. laid off hundreds of employees Thursday and Friday, the company’s largest cuts in Austin since it downsized after the tech bust in 2001.

Dell spokesman Jess Blackburn declined to say how many jobs the company eliminated but said it’s “probably a fair characterization that it’s the most significant” since Dell laid off 5,700 workers in 2001.

Several laid-off employees, who declined to be named, said they heard from colleagues that the company had cut at least 300 jobs. Dell occasionally has laid off workers in the area but typically in smaller numbers than this week’s cuts.

The company eliminated 150 jobs when it downsized its local data centers in fall 2002 and cut another 141 employees from its product development group about five months later.

“We certainly understand it’s significant for them,” Blackburn said of employees affected in the latest round of cuts. “But in terms of characterizing the size of the job actions taken, it’s a small percentage of our overall work force” in Central Texas.

Dell employs roughly 18,000 people in Round Rock, Austin and near Waco. That’s up from a low of about 16,000 in 2001, when the company cut almost one-fourth of its Central Texas work force in response to a massive slowdown in high-tech spending.

Blackburn said the bulk of the recent layoffs stemmed from a major realignment of Dell’s consumer business.

The company is folding its consumer-focused operations back into the Americas group, he said, returning to a structure the company used in the past.

“As a result of that, unfortunately, there have been people whose jobs have been eliminated,” Blackburn said, adding that some of the job cuts extend beyond the consumer-division realignment.

Five laid-off employees, all of whom asked not to be identified, said Dell has been tightening its belt since the company missed its revenue forecast in the second quarter and cut its sales forecast for the third quarter, which ended Friday. Dell’s stock has hovered around $32 a share in recent weeks, roughly $10 less than it was trading before the earnings release Aug. 11.

One of the laid-off workers said, “I didn’t see it coming too long ago, but within the past couple days, things seemed odd. I couldn’t put my finger on it at the time, but now I can look back and say, ‘Ah, a couple of those things make sense now.’ ”

At least four current employees, who also declined to be named, have said in recent months that the company has postponed some job transfers and restricted travel and other nonessential expenses such as off-site meetings.

When asked about the tighter control of expenses in September, Chairman Michael Dell said, “There are always things we’re doing. We’re very focused on execution. . . . There’s no lack of attention there.”

This ones rich folks… Hire the PETA president for your personal assitant for the day.

Here’s a unique chance to hire hands-on corporate administrator and founder Ingrid Newkirk, president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), as your personal assistant for a day.

Use her experience in animal matters and corporate know-how to good advantage, perhaps by having her accompany you on your annual hunting expedition or to the rodeo or a bullfight.

What about having her redesign your animal testing lab or your bear bile farm, check your trapline, sharpen the lamb mulesing shears on your Outback farm or unload your poor old sheep from the docks in Dubai, build supports to stop your cattle from slipping off the truck ramps at the leather market, or count how many times the workers at your slaughterhouse miss with the captive-bolt gun?

My suggestion, forget animal testing, lets move on to people testing. See if the president of PETA will save the white mice for injections of an unkown substance and instead volunteer herself!

Flu Shots! No it won’t protect you against Asian Bird “Fru” but it will protect you from the usual flu season…

Tucker Max has launched a new site.. Coloring book land. I’ve wet my huggies from laughing so much.

And if you thought that was funny, check out Airtoons. I find this one particuarly funny.