Bonjour et Bienvenue au Récapitulation de Fin de la Semaine du Weekend pour Novembre 22-28, l’édition internationale!

Sunday: Silva Kashif, 16, was lashed 50 times after a judge ruled her knee-length skirt was indecent. Sudan, ruled by Islamic Shariah law, has come to the international spotlight over the last two years for the government’s harsh and ever-changing “indecency laws” for women. Kashif’s family plans on suing the police who arrested the girl and the judge who handed down the sentence, claiming that Silva is a Christian and should be exempt from the religious law. “Kashif’s lawyer Azhari al-Haj told Reuters he was preparing a case against the police and judge for arresting and sentencing an underage girl. He said according to the law, people under 18 should not be given lashes.” Cultural relativism? Fine, whatever, if you want to be ruled by a strict Islamic legal code, go for it. However, in this case, the victim was a Christian minor. Well, way to hit a little girl, Sudan. You sure showed her, I’ll bet she’s lining up to convert all ready.

Monday: LARGE. HARDON. COLLIDER. It works. It’s running. No one died. Lots of teeny, tiny, mind-bogglingly, counter-intuitively small explosions at speeds your human brain cannot possibly understand are being mapped RIGHT NOW at CERN laboratories in Switzerland. And France. Becuase this thing is HUGE. Now, I’m not a particle physicist, and I can’t pretend to be, so I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to be seeing, but check this shit out. (Click here for photos of crazy science)

Tuesday: Only in Sverige. “Swedish police say they’ve cleared a man who was arrested for allegedly murdering his wife after deciding the culprit was most likely a moose (AP).” Last year 63 year-old Agneta Westlund was found dead after taking an evening walk through the woods. Her husband was originally arrested and held for 10 days before charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence. Now, analysis of hair and saliva found on Westund’s body is leading investigators to believe she was attacked by a moose.

Wednesday: Ahem… “Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sought to expand Tehran’s influence in Latin America and deepen his alliance with Venezuela’s Hugo Chavez on Wednesday in a visit that offered him a platform to defend his country’s nuclear program. Chavez and Ahmadinejad were to meet Wednesday afternoon to discuss cooperation in energy, investments, trade and other areas. It was the final leg of the Iranian leader’s three-country goodwill tour of Latin America, after stops in Brazil and Bolivia. Iran has helped Venezuela set up factories that assemble cars, tractors and bicycles, and Iranian businesses have sent crews to build public housing under contracts with Venezuela. Both Chavez and Bolivian President Evo Morales have offered support for Iran’s nuclear program, saying it is peaceful and not aimed at developing nuclear weapons as the U.S. and European nations fear (AP).” Those italicized words are the parts I don’t believe.

Thursday: The Hajj, or annual pilgrimage to Mecca, began, and spurred a rash of swine flu craziness. Of the 2.5 million pilgrims, only some 10% had been vaccinated against H1-N1. Seventy-three cases had been reported, including 5 deaths, by the end of the rite on Sunday, though the full extent of the virus transmission will probably not be known until next week, after the pilgrims have returned to their home countries. “Saudi officials, along with American and international health experts, worked to curb any outbreak during the hajj. Health officials circulated among the sprawling tent camp at Mina where the pilgrims lived and gave the faithful cheek swabs for testing later. They also placed hand sanitizer dispensers on walls in the camps, near public bathrooms and at ritual sites, while pilgrims arriving at Saudi airports were scanned using a thermal camera and offered a free vaccine (AP).”

Friday: The parents of American Amanda Knox are being investigated for defamation after claiming Italian police brutalized their daughter before her arrest over a year ago for the November 2007 murder of her roommatein Perugia. This was to be the final week of the case, with a ruling expected in the next few days. Knox, her former boyfriend, and a fellow student are all facing various charges in the slaying of Meredith Kercher, of Leeds. Ina case ripped from th seediest episode of Law and Order: SVU, Kercher was tortured, raped, and killed during a strange, drug fueled sex orgy… thing. Details of the case are either “not released” or completely turned upside down by the Italian press. This case is never going away, is it?

Saturday: The Red Cross released a report stating that as many as 10,000 African albinos are now living in hiding after a recent rash of killings in East Africa. “The report says the market for albino parts exists mainly in Tanzania, where a complete set of body parts — including all limbs, genitals, ears, tongue and nose — can sell for $75,000. Wealthy buyers use the parts as talismans to bring them wealth and good fortune (AP).” Albinism has long been seen as a sign of bad luck or infidelity in many African cultures, and now many believe that people more with this pigmentation disorder are mentally retarded. Albinos in East Africa are rarely sent to school, and are forced in to menial jobs outdoors which puts them at great risk for skin cancers. The latest killing happened in late October in Tanzania’s Mwanza region, where a 10 year-old boy was beheaded and dismembered. Local healers and “witch doctors” claim albino body parts can have healing properties. These practices have seen a rise in business over the last few years, as African governments spurn Western medicines, most notably in South Africa under President Mbeki.

The Weekend Week’s End Wrap Up for August 2 thru August 8 is brought to you by coffee, because it is the only thing between me and a persistent vegetative state.

Sunday: Twilight, the sexy sultry teen vampire saga strangely adopted as a champion of abstinence only education, is a big ol’ rip off. Stephenie Meyer is being accused of plagiarism, specifically in her 2008 book “Breaking Dawn,” by Jordan Scott, author of “The Nocturne,” apparently another book about a vampire that marries a girl and turns her in to a vampire. See also: anything ever written with a vampire.

Monday: Former President Bill Clinton went to North Korea and brought back two American journalists who had been jailed for over four months in the scariest place in the world. In order to do this, he had to play nice with the craziest human being since Tomas de Torquemada. Welcome home, ladies.Well done, bubba.

Tuesday: Close in line to NK’s “scariest place” standing, a woman is going to be publicly whipped for having the audacity to wear pants in Sudan. Lubna Hussein, a former U.N. worker is facing 40 lashes on the charge of “indecent dressing.” Hussein has gained quite a following of equally nefarious, immoral women, who are braving tear gas and police brutality as they gather before her jail, wearing pants. I think we’ve all had just about enough of this Sharia business.

Wednesday: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was sworn in to his second term as president. Not that it means much. There are still those who believe the election was a farce, and even among political conservatives there is an ongoing argument over how much power the president should have, if any, over Ali Khamenei, the Supreme Leader. I’m predicting total civil war within three months. I’ll keep you posted.

Thursday: “In a resolution adopted on a 125-to-4 vote by the American Psychological Association’s governing council, and in a comprehensive report based on two years of research, the 150,000-member association put itself firmly on record in opposition of so-called ‘reparative therapy’ which seeks to change sexual orientation.(AP)” This was not decided in 1973. This meeting happened last week. Who are the four people who still think you can electrocute the gay out of people? And are they still allowed to practice?

Friday: Twitter came back and the world rejoiced by tweeting about how twitter was back and caused the site to crash again. Facebook and LiveJournal took some hits, too, and it turns out that it was all because someone got pissed at some blogger named “Cyxymu.”

Saturday: “Sonia Sotomayor was sworn in Saturday as the Supreme Court’s first Hispanic justice and only third female member in the top U.S. court’s 220-year history. (AP)” Chief Justice Roberts had the courtesy not to screw up her oath of office.

The Weekend Week’s End Wrap Up for June 28-July 4 is brought to you by George Washington. Why not?

Sunday: It was the fortieth anniversary of the Stone Wall raid, and somebody at the Texas Alcoholic Beverages Commission made a big, big mistake. Half a dozen police officers and about as many TAB employees conducted a “routine inspection of a newly-opened gay bar, the Rainbow Lounge,” in Forth Worth. Some of the officers allege that bar patrons made sexually explicit gestures, and accused one man of grabbing an officer’s crotch. Chad Gibson, 26, “fell” and is, as of posting day, still in the hospital recovering from a fractured skull and internal bleeding. I’m in no position to blame the officers or call this a “gay bashing,” but you’d think someone might have wanted to reschedule this particular check up.

Monday: “Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin’ off Nantucket Sound from the nor’ east and the dogs are howlin’ for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the ‘Ellie May,’ a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin’ and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests.” That, my friends, is the winner of the San Jose State University’s annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. Written by David McKenzie, 55, of Federal Way, Washington, this sentence was deemed the worst possible opening to a novel. The prize, “is named after Victorian writer Edward George Earl Bulwer-Lytton, who opened his 1830 novel ‘Paul Clifford,’ with the much-quoted, ‘It was a dark and stormy night … ‘”

Tuesday: Kari Huus, writing for msnbc.com, interviewed Farah Pahlavi, the widow of Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi, and former empress of Iran. Living in exile since 1979, she gives a unique perspective to this whole ordeal. Read the interview here (interview)

Wednesday: “Mexican authorities say two professional wrestlers found dead in a low-rent hotel in the capital may have been drugged to death by female robbers. (AP)” This is misleading. These men weren’t just any luchadores, they were La Parkita (Little Death) and “Espectrito Jr.” What kind of drugs, and in what dose, must these women have given these robust men to kill them? Well, uh… they were midgets. “Midget wrestlers.” Not my word, it was in the headline. Apparently prostitutes and drug traffickers in Mexico use this tactic a lot, but most of the time the men just wake up a few hours later in some crummy hotel room. Unfortunately, this robbery proved fatal. RIP, little warriors.

Thursday: Oh, so you got a shiny, fancy new iPhone, huh? What about when it gets stolen and now some thief has access to your twitter and gmail? Apple is thinking ahead, and created the Find My iPhone App, which can allow you to track your stolen phone and erase the data on it. Maverick Mobile has an app that allows you to send a text message to your phone to activate a loud alarm. Something tells me iPhone thieves aren’t so much after your passwords as they are the crack money they can get for your gadget.

Friday: Unless you have grown and/or raised it yourself, there is no such thing as organic food. And the USDA knows it. It was revealed that over 90% of “organic” baby formula contains synthetic additives that, three years ago, were banned from foods carrying the label. “The government’s turnaround, from prohibition to permission, came after a USDA program manager was lobbied by the formula makers and overruled her staff (Kindy and Layton, Washington post).” Also, Kraft owns Boca, and Coca-cola owns Honest Tea. Quit wasting all your money on this organic fad.

Saturday: Hey, Honduras! How’s it going? Hey, look, I, uh… gosh, this is hard to say, but, um… look, we really like you and all. Remember that summer in Roatan? Good times… Look, it’s just that the UN is really kind of pissed off, and the OAS isn’t too happy, either. I mean, they said they might kick you out if you don’t let Pres. Zelaya back in. I’m not going to pretend I know the whole story, but… with Iran and all… could you just, kind of, knock it off? No, no, not knock HIM off, I meant… Listen, we’re bringing a bunch of our soldiers back from a desert, and they really don’t want to head right back out to the tropics, you know? Can’t you just, you know, vote, or write a petition or something? (PS: Make up your own opinion of the domestic struggle in Honduras, at the moment I prefer to let the country work this out on its own.)

The Weekend Week’s End Wrap Up for June 21 through 27 is brought to you by one serious news story and a cavalcade of tabloid gold!

Sunday: Vote tampering has been confirmed in the Irania election. Chatham House, a London based research organization, “showed that in two provinces where Mr. Ahmadinejad won a week ago, a turnout of more than 100 percent was recorded.” (NYT) Also, check the list of journalists and politicians arrested in Iran and support however you can. http://tehranbureau.com/list-imprisoned-iranian-journalists-politicians/

Monday: Jon and Kate are getting divorced. Their one hour super special special episode special featured the kids getting playhouses (one was a haunted house, it was badass) and Kate picking a fight over where to put the playhouses. Also, Jon had both of his ears pierced and then the final half hour was just Kate pretending to cry in solo couch interviews. I have traveled to mid-state Pennsylvania to try and get a one on one interview with Jon (but mostly to visit you, Mom). I arrived in State College just in time to see Jon buy a round of flaming Dr. Pepper’s for the girls of Alpha Phi and toast to freedom. No joke. Spread the word.

Tuesday: A conservative off shoot of Simon and Schuster (I don’t know either) has offered Former VP Richard B. Cheney a chance to write his memoirs of his life in politics. I guess it makes sense, the only vice president to ever make any sort of impact whatsoever should probably get another word in. (“We will, in fact, be greeted as liberators.”) Or maybe not….

Wednesday: Until recently, I never had much reason to prefer Georgia to South Carolina. The roads are terrible in both states, it’s hot as hell everywhere, and both have peaches (SC has more, GA’s are better). However, Sonny Perdue never abandoned the state to fark someone halfway around the world. Thank you, Governor Mark Sanford! One thing: I do not believe the tears in your apology. The flight to Argentina is long. It’s really long. You had plenty of time to think of how much of a bad decision this was going to be. Also, who spends five days “crying in Argentina?” Who are you, Evita?

Thursday: Are you kidding, nothing at all happened on Thursday. Most boring news day in history. (RIP Farrah, MJ)

Friday: Oh, right, Michael Jackson died. Nothing happened on Friday either. Lots of people crying, some prisoners danced to Thriller. Watch the video here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o)

Saturday: Saturday I sat on my uncle’s couch, played crossword puzzles, and read comic books, so I have no idea what happened. The answer 14 across was “Sidewinder.” The two-part two time US Open winner (7 down, 10 across) was Ernie Els. Hey, did the US beat Spain in soccer?

Uhm, Mahmoud?

A little tip. When trying to mollify a growing discontent and attempts at revolution, showing your people a three movie marathon built around a small group of people fighting insurmountable odds to defeat a monstrous ruler and winning might not be the best of choices.

Just Sayin’.

Out.

Recently, several key officials and key military personnel in Iran have threatened to close the Strait of Hormuz if they are attacked by Israel. Or they just might close it because they are pissed with the world. Now, given that 40% of the world’s oil passes through this strait currently, you can imagine the type of problem that would cause. Lets also discuss what would happen is a US backed Israel attacked Iran. A major concern is that China and Iran are very good buddies, and while China may frown on Iran closing down the straight, they most likely would not go to war with the US and Israel. But, they could impose sanctions on the US. Although it would hurt the Chinese economy since the majority of Chinese exports come to the US, they would do it out of political and strategic spite to bend the US to coming to some sort of quick agreement to not back Israel.

So what is the fall out? The American economy will plunge into darkness. If Chinese sanctions are imposed on exports Wal-Mart will close up shop very quickly, followed suit by many other large retailers like Kmart, Sams, and Ikea would suffer, while they are a Swedish store, the majority of their products are made in China. Ikea does not first ship their product from China to Sweden they ship from China to the US. So there would have to be some creative shipping involved. Granted the US is not Ikea’s only country they sell to, but it would hurt their profits because Americans are some of the top consumers of Ikea products.

Forget about $4/gallon gas try $8/gallon. How can you work at McDonalds making $9/hr when it costs you your entire pay check to fill your car up twice in one week? Let’s assume you take $1440 home a month, you need to subtract $640 in gas if it was at $8/gallon.

How long do you think it will take to club a couple baby seals in Alaska to drill for oil now? How about drilling off the coast of Florida?

Has it ever been this bad before?

In Austin: A shooting, a man held up in a house that was then lit on fire.
In Virginia, a lunatic guns down 32 people
In Somalia, War is currently raging with Islamic/Muslim extremists
In France a new president run off between the far right and the far left. They both have to deal with things like a Muslim population that houses potential insurgents that – have made clear they want to turn France into a Muslim state.
In Isreal the terrorist group Hamas urges Palestinians to up rocket attacks to kill more Jews.
In Iran, the country continues to push its agenda of backing Hamas and Hesbolah. Iran previously kidnapped British troops and coerced them into stating they had come into Iranian waters.
Syria, backs Islamic fundamentalists.

A lot of people talk about intolerance and peace and how we should be tolerant of religions and shoot for peace. Looking at the world view, it seems one religion feels differently. Apparently there are a lot of “Militant Islamic” groups and they continue to get financial backing. Can religions take over countries in modern days? Why does one feel that Islam is the only religion? What is the breaking point for civil society?