Wrap up for June 28 thru July 4
posted by MarieThe Weekend Week’s End Wrap Up for June 28-July 4 is brought to you by George Washington. Why not?
Sunday: It was the fortieth anniversary of the Stone Wall raid, and somebody at the Texas Alcoholic Beverages Commission made a big, big mistake. Half a dozen police officers and about as many TAB employees conducted a “routine inspection of a newly-opened gay bar, the Rainbow Lounge,” in Forth Worth. Some of the officers allege that bar patrons made sexually explicit gestures, and accused one man of grabbing an officer’s crotch. Chad Gibson, 26, “fell” and is, as of posting day, still in the hospital recovering from a fractured skull and internal bleeding. I’m in no position to blame the officers or call this a “gay bashing,” but you’d think someone might have wanted to reschedule this particular check up.
Monday: “Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin’ off Nantucket Sound from the nor’ east and the dogs are howlin’ for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the ‘Ellie May,’ a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin’ and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests.” That, my friends, is the winner of the San Jose State University’s annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. Written by David McKenzie, 55, of Federal Way, Washington, this sentence was deemed the worst possible opening to a novel. The prize, “is named after Victorian writer Edward George Earl Bulwer-Lytton, who opened his 1830 novel ‘Paul Clifford,’ with the much-quoted, ‘It was a dark and stormy night … ‘”
Tuesday: Kari Huus, writing for msnbc.com, interviewed Farah Pahlavi, the widow of Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi, and former empress of Iran. Living in exile since 1979, she gives a unique perspective to this whole ordeal. Read the interview here (interview)
Wednesday: “Mexican authorities say two professional wrestlers found dead in a low-rent hotel in the capital may have been drugged to death by female robbers. (AP)” This is misleading. These men weren’t just any luchadores, they were La Parkita (Little Death) and “Espectrito Jr.” What kind of drugs, and in what dose, must these women have given these robust men to kill them? Well, uh… they were midgets. “Midget wrestlers.” Not my word, it was in the headline. Apparently prostitutes and drug traffickers in Mexico use this tactic a lot, but most of the time the men just wake up a few hours later in some crummy hotel room. Unfortunately, this robbery proved fatal. RIP, little warriors.
Thursday: Oh, so you got a shiny, fancy new iPhone, huh? What about when it gets stolen and now some thief has access to your twitter and gmail? Apple is thinking ahead, and created the Find My iPhone App, which can allow you to track your stolen phone and erase the data on it. Maverick Mobile has an app that allows you to send a text message to your phone to activate a loud alarm. Something tells me iPhone thieves aren’t so much after your passwords as they are the crack money they can get for your gadget.
Friday: Unless you have grown and/or raised it yourself, there is no such thing as organic food. And the USDA knows it. It was revealed that over 90% of “organic” baby formula contains synthetic additives that, three years ago, were banned from foods carrying the label. “The government’s turnaround, from prohibition to permission, came after a USDA program manager was lobbied by the formula makers and overruled her staff (Kindy and Layton, Washington post).” Also, Kraft owns Boca, and Coca-cola owns Honest Tea. Quit wasting all your money on this organic fad.
Saturday: Hey, Honduras! How’s it going? Hey, look, I, uh… gosh, this is hard to say, but, um… look, we really like you and all. Remember that summer in Roatan? Good times… Look, it’s just that the UN is really kind of pissed off, and the OAS isn’t too happy, either. I mean, they said they might kick you out if you don’t let Pres. Zelaya back in. I’m not going to pretend I know the whole story, but… with Iran and all… could you just, kind of, knock it off? No, no, not knock HIM off, I meant… Listen, we’re bringing a bunch of our soldiers back from a desert, and they really don’t want to head right back out to the tropics, you know? Can’t you just, you know, vote, or write a petition or something? (PS: Make up your own opinion of the domestic struggle in Honduras, at the moment I prefer to let the country work this out on its own.)
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July 5th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
hehe…midgets..