You know there is one thing that really gets on my nerves and its women who can’t make up their minds about which name to take when they marry so they hyphenate their last name. The only thing that is worse is a man who takes the woman’s last name. What the hell are you thinking? Obviously we know who wears the pants in that relationship, hell you gave up your testicles at birth.

Sure our society is changing, and “oh you should be open minded” but damnit I think its plain silly. What happened to the Jones’s? Well now its Mr Jones, Mrs. Jones-Smith-Robertson, and their children Ronnie, and Willy Jones-Smith. No wonder we have no family unit in this country any more, you can’t have a solid family if you’re all out doing your own thing. No wonder divorce is on the up and up.

Lets look at the most current divorce Rate:

RAW NUMBERS. The Center has released total state and regional marriage and divorce numbers (not the same thing as rates) for the years 2000, 1999 and 1998.
The total numbers of U.S. divorces (excluding the non-counting states) reported finalized annually are 957,200 in 2000, 944,317 in 1999, and 947,384 in 1998.
The total numbers of U.S. marriages (including those states) reported celebrated annually are 2,355,005 in 2000, 2,366,623 in 1999, and 2,267,854 in 1998.

PROJECTION/PREDICTION. This is the Census Bureau’s often-cited “50%” rate, the proportion of marriages taking place right now that will eventually divorce, which has since been revised downward to roughly 43% by the National Center for Health Statistics but was moved back up to around 50% by the Census Bureau in 2002, with even more ifs ands and buts than usual. Most recently, according to the New York Times, it has been revised downward to just over 40%.

A lot of people say “oh 80% marriage ends in divorce” well the numbers speak for themselves its currently 40-50%. Regardless, if you look at 50 years ago that estimate was considerably lower; around 14%. All because women are hyphenating their last names. Just Kidding. Its really a culmination of different socio-economic and environmental problems or changes if you will. But my main point - women who hyphenate their last names are bitches. It’s true I have proof. Every woman I talk to that has a hyphenated last name has a chip on her shoulder that is so big, it holds her up. Makes her feel all warm and fuzzy inside,and she sleeps comfortable in her fully-recycled-biodegradable mattress, next to her fully-ignorant, liberated castrato.

“I’m liberated. I hyphenate.”

You’re a bitch. And any man who is sucker enough to marry you deserves you. Just don’t breed anymore demon spawn to screw up my gene pool.

Now before you start the flaming, I want to give you some food for thought. This is America and you have the right, or rather the freedom to say whatever you want, to hyphenate your last name. In other countries if you looked at a man wrong you would be slapped, punished, or worse. In some middle eastern countries if a woman is found not to be a virgin on her wedding night she is killed. You’ve got it pretty good here, but I’ll be willing to wager that the majority of women with hyphenated last names are against the War in Iraq, the place where we have just ensured the freedom and rights of people just like us, and women who have to go through those type of ordeals. So you tell me was it worth it? Should we still be there upholding what you take for granted here in the states, why don’t we just deport you over there and see how long your hyphen lasts.

So I look at the recently updated sites from blogger and they are all company websites - meaning spam sites that take advantage of googles search to boost their links to the top of the list. Case in Point.

Where does it end?

Here

I don’t know exactly what it is, but it just seems really funny to me. Maybe it’s that expression on her face. Still, I present it to you. Enjoy.

Out.

I am no stranger to Online dating. In fact, neither is my mom, who up until I left for college in ‘97 had never ever used a computer. Now she emails me rather than calling on the phone. (Hi mom).

Online dating allows for several key elements to take place:

1. If you’re fairly busy in your own life and don’t have the time to go out every night and meet a potential mate; it allows for ease of dating. Now in reality you can pick up a potential mate anywhere: grocery store, video store, dog park, porn shop… but lets face it, some of us just aren’t that lucky. (I actually met one of my girlfriends on an airplane once)

2. Online dating allows for screening of potential candidates. What do you mean by screening you ask? I mean we are able, through email, to question them. To question their motives, their past and while it may not be truthful, it at least allows you to formulate an opinion about if you’d like to meet that person.

Online dating has shown us a different view of dating in general. A bi-product of this is that it has opened up easy access to someone’s skeleton closet in ways not available in normal social circles. Meaning, its easier online to ask someone if they are a freaking loony than it is in person (for some people). And that said, its easier for someone online to be more forward and upfront about all sorts of things that they would in real life - (face to face) - have had reservations about.

MJ and I have come to the premise that about 75% of the women both of us have met through online means are complete nutters, or mental cases. The other 25% Have children and are just fine. Now how did we come to this conclusion? Personal experience. Or you cold call it in the name of science. We’ve gone out with a lot of women through various online dating places, and a lot of them have had really serious issues, things that had we met in person, chances are those things may not have come up until much much later in the dating process.

MJ would argue that meeting someone in person is preferable because people who use the online dating are using it as a last resort. While he could be right, I don’t see it as a last resort and MJ himself has used it from time to time as well and certainly not as a last resort. Both of us through out our dating have dated women we’ve met first in person and online and I personally venture that the same percentage of them have the exact same problems.

Case in point, after I had broken up with my x-fiance I had dated around. I happened on a party where a very attractive law student made it clear to me that she wanted to be romantically involved. Now at first she was perfectly normal, but after a bit things started to turn a might strange and come to find out she was bi-polar. MJ, much later on met a girl who was attractive, who also worked at the local video store. Now he’ll hate me for this but the man has a knack for attracting women with kids (a deal breaker for me usually). Turns out that she did indeed have a kid, and they started dating. Low-and behold what happened? She turned up bi-polar.

Somewhere between the law student and the video girl, MJ met a fairly attractive model online - they dated a few times but he quickly came to the opinion that she herself was a complete nutter as well. So what we are seeing here is a pattern. Either A, MJ and I have really bad luck with women lately - which could be part of the problem. B the Austin Dating community is flooded with nutters. Or C - our first premise was right, but along with my premise - that most women in general have issues online or in person.

Now wait. Don’t get on the defensive. The same could be argued for men. I am just stating an opinion based on our scientific data collected. You fruity people you.

Some people choose to overlook the discrepancies with those women, but to us, mental issues are just things that can’t be overlooked. I want someone that can respect my space, ie doesn’t need to be around me 24/7 and who doesn’t get jealous at the drop of the hat. Not only that, she needs to have her own friends and entertainment.

I’m getting off track here. Maybe its just the dating scene in Austin, but to me it seems like everyone is a victim, and there is always something to blame for why they are like the way they are. But in all seriousness, where are the women who are just normal, no screwed up issues, no wacked jealous x’s that stalk them, no kids?

If Austin touts itself as the singles capitol of the world, I think its true, cause we keep passing around the same nutters and coming to the same conclusion. Now there are those of us who have been fortunate to find and latch onto another sane person and make their way through relationship hell. Many of them have come and asked me my advice. Like “how do you make it last when you can’t meet on common ground on certain things?” or “Shes a liberal and I’m a conservative…” Well that’s something I think I’ll save for another day.

Now taking all of the above into account I will say that I did happen to go out with an attractive female over the weekend and the date went well - no skeletons (yet) no children, and not popping pills right and left.

So I’ve got that going for me…

Which is nice.

So, it turns out I’ve had a busier summer than you may think.

See, I’ve been involved in the making of a movie this summer. I won’t state just how involved I was yet, but I’ve asked the producers and they’ve allowed me to put the link for the trailer premiering today up on Wetwired. You can see the trailer here. Enjoy.

Out.

Sometimes, I woder if there is or is not a higher power in this universe- some sort of higher intelligence that made this whole shindig occur. My skeptical nature makes me question religion, and I wonder if maybe a majority of the Earth’s population is wrong about a higher being- whatever it may be.

And then I saw this.

Okay, make sure you see that link before you continue.

I mean it. Go.

…

Okay, back? Good.

I get the feeling that someone on there said “And may God strike me down if I’m lying.” God, hearing this, said “Hunh. Little pissant wants to try and tempt me? How about a heart attack for you here?”

Thus, what you see in that link.

Questioning is hereby withdrawn for today.

Out.

Sometimes over the course of a day, a person comes across a forgotten aspect of themselves that- upon rediscovering that aspect- tends to embarass them a little. That has happened to me today.

There’s a forum I visit called BBChatter. It’s a web forum for fans of Big Brother, a show that I watch- well, pretty much religiously every summer. It’s the reason I keep myself locked up in my apartment pretty much from early July to the end of September. Since I joined the site, I’ve been putting Wetwired in my signature there to try and drive up hits to the site.

(See, Py? I can be a good little site pimp when I need to be too.)

Anyway, my ID at the site is flandai. It’s a combination of letters from my name, and an ID I’ve used for years in email and such. Someone asked me about it at the site, and I explained about its origin. Upon doing this, though, I decided to check and see if I could find any links to pages with that in Google.

That’s when I came across this.

Okay, stop laughing.

Seriously.

The first part of that site that I don’t like too much is that it has my real name in it, something that LSU in its infinite wisdom didn’t think was necessary to keep private back in those simpler days of 1997.

Yes, 1997. That site was created when I transferred to LSU.

The second aspect of the site I’m not too keen on is that my writing on it is… well, it sucks- plain and simple. I’ve improved (at least, in my own mind) over the years, and those early attempts at both humor and wit still embarass the hell out of me. I’m not exactly claiming to be Pulitzer material now, but my writings today are a great deal better than they were back then. I will, however, note that at the least my style of writing does show its infancy in this webpage. I’m sarcastic, self-effacing and working hard to avoid any semblance of being serious.

Now, if I’m not a fan of this site then why would I show it to you, you may ask? Call it a preventative measure. If I point out how shitty things were when I first made my presence online then hopefully you’ll appreciate how far I’ve come here, instead of pointing out how shitty my writing can be on THIS site.

So, I’ll have that going for me.

Which is nice.

Out.

Today we have these quick graphics and soundtracks to go with the media, but our media has lost sight of what really matters. Capturing the moment in words that can truly describe an event with emotion. This was passed along to me by the mother unit. This man was a friend of the family and died during the war, but not before he won a pulitzer.

(2) Ernie Pyle, Washington Daily News (10th January, 1944)

In this war I have known a lot of officers who were loved and respected by the soldiers under them. But never have I crossed the trail of any man as beloved as Capt. Henry T. Waskow of Belton, Texas.

Capt. Waskow was a company commander in the 36th Division. He had been in this company since long before he left the States. He was very young, only in his middle twenties, but he carried in him a sincerity and gentleness that made people want to be guided by him.

“After my own father, he comes next,” a sergeant told me.

“He always looked after us,” a soldier said. “He’d go to bat for us every time.”

“I’ve never known him to do anything unkind,” another one said.

I was at the foot of the mule trail the night they brought Capt. Waskow down. The moon was nearly full, and you could see far up the trail, and even part way across the valley. Soldiers made shadows as they walked.

We went out into the road. Four mules stood there in the moonlight, in the road where the trail came down off
the mountain. The soldiers who led them stood there waiting.

“This one is Capt. Waskow,” one of them said quickly.

Two men unlashed his body from the mule and lifted it off and laid it in the shadow beside the stone wall. Other men took the other bodies off. Finally, there were five lying end to end in a long row. You don’t cover up dead men in the combat zones. They just lie there in the shadows until somebody else comes after them.

The uncertain mules moved off to their olive groves. The men in the road seemed reluctant to leave. They stood around, and gradually I could sense them moving, one by one, close to Capt. Waskow’s body. Not so much to look, I think, as to say something in finality to him and to themselves. I stood close by and I could
hear.

One soldier came and looked down, and he said out loud:

“God damn it!”

Another one came, and he said. “God damn it to hell anyway!” He looked down for a few last moments and then turned and left.

Another man came. I think he was an officer. It was hard to tell officers from men in the dim light, for everybody was grimy and dirty. The man looked down into the dead captain’s face and then spoke directly to him, as though he were alive:

“I’m sorry, old man.”

Then a soldier came and stood beside the officer and bent over, and he too spoke to his dead captain, not in a whisper but awfully tender, and he said:

“I sure am sorry, sir.”

Then the first man squatted down, and he reached down and took the Captain’s hand, and he sat there a full five minutes
holding the dead hand in his own and looking intently into the dead face. And he never uttered a sound all the time he sat there.

Finally he put the hand down. He reached up and gently straightened the points of the Captain’s shirt collar, and then he
sort of rearranged the tattered edges of his uniform around the wound, and then he got up and walked away down the road in the moonlight, all alone.

Everyone seems to want to bash my *deemed* inappropriate question. “Oh, why would you ask someone that the first time you just meet them?”

Well why not? If you’re already in a line of personal questioning and you have gauged that person to be a bit nutty, why not ask them if they are on anti-depressants? Especially if they have already told you they are depressed all the time? Forget about the fact that the conversation was only little snipits; ie the important factors that made me determine she was obviously not worth talking to any longer.

In today’s society marriages fail right and left. I myself was engaged at one point and by sheer luck and many arguments we determined that it was not to be. Point being I spent 4 years of my life with her only to find out in the end that religion and money were the main factors in us not getting along. Relationships boil down to several major factors that you must meet on neutral ground in order to move forward.

Money
Religion
Politics
Sex

And on lesser notes:
Intelligence
Introvert vs Extrovert
Amiable

Mainly if you cannot agree on the main ones you’re doomed. Now society tells us that we shouldn’t pry into someone’s lives, we should make small talk and avoid the things that we really would like to know first. Why? Ask yourself why is it wrong to ask someone right up front what they believe in?

What’s the first thing you do when you are looking to buy a used car? You ask “Has it been in an accident? Why are you selling it so cheap?”

Why should looking for a potential mate be any different? Now, don’t answer this with out a truly well thought out answer. One lined “you’re stupid that’s just the way it is” Just shows you that you’re the one who is a moron.

Our society, our race as humans has changed. Our social graces have changed. Hell, at one point in Human culture homosexuality was common practice within Greek and roman society, today its still looked at as unnatural. Society tells us that its not right, I myself have trouble accepting it. 50 years ago a womans only job was to be susy homemaker now its a rare sight to see a single income household. Both man and wife bring home the bacon and yet, the woman is still by society expected to have dinner ready. Our society has been changing, our social mores have been altered.

So really, what is the real question here? Many of you who criticize me have had yourselves very bad experiences and had you asked the right questions up front, you’d have avoided them all together. Sure you can say “well my mistakes make me the person I am today.” But what you could be saying is, “my asking the right questions, ultimately led me to live a happier life with the one I truly belong with.” Instead of a mundane life with someone who is “almost” the right person who has just a few too many skeletons in his/her closet.

KENNEDY SPACE CENTER, Florida (CNN) — The space shuttle Discovery touched down Tuesday morning, completing NASA’s first shuttle mission since Columbia broke apart during re-entry in February 2003.

The shuttle landed at 5:11 a.m. PT at NASA’s secondary landing site at Edwards Air Force Base in California.

As commander Eileen Collins brought the orbiter to a stop on runway 22, NASA spokesman James Hartsfield stated, “Discovery is home.”

“Congratulations on a truly spectacular test flight,” mission control radioed the crew. “Welcome home friends.”

“We’re happy to be back,” Collins said.

“We brought Discovery back in great shape,” she said later after getting a look around the spacecraft.

She thanked all the people who worked on the mission calling it “fantastic.”

It was the 50th shuttle landing at Edwards.

With Discovery safely back on Earth, NASA officials breathed a huge sigh of relief.

“It’s a good day to be us,” program manager Bill Parsons said at a Kennedy Space Center news conference.

“There isn’t any of this that is easy … Eileen made it look like a cake walk,” associate administrator Mike Readdy said.

I got a message from this very attractive somewhat older woman yesturday:

oh my how come your not taken?

your so handsome…i would love to have a blast with you…go sightseeing…and take pics with ya..

XXXXXXXX

Update, for those of you playing the home game these are excerpts, not one continuous converstation:

I talk to her through yahoo and ask her what she does:
pylorns : what do you do when you have a job
pylorns : …
Her: receptionist
her : sorry was n kitchen
pylorns : so like a professional receptionist…
her : yeah
her : but its boring
pylorns : have a degree?
her : no
her : got a degree thingy in subsitute teaching
pylorns : plan on going back?
her : to where?
pylorns : college
her : no

Much later on:
pylorns: just want to marry a rich guy and live comfortably eh
her : lol
her : lol
her : lol
her : y do u say that
pylorns : am i wrong?

Much much later:
pylorns : do you take any anti-depressents?
her : yes
pylorns : which
her : prozac

… need I say more?

Mother ditches son after fast-food tantrum

According to authorities, Lori Marie Heine abandoned her seven-year-old son by the road and drove off.

Why? The boy threw a tantrum after she refused to buy two McDonald’s Happy Meals that he wanted.

Authorities in Florida disagreed with Heine’s parenting tactic and charged her with child abuse and neglect.

According to Zephyr Hills Police Captain Randy Delasic, the boy wandered up to a stranger at a local park at about 8:23 p.m. on July 26 and requested help locating his mother. The boy informed the man that his mother had gotten angry because he had asked for a cheeseburger Happy Meal and a Chicken McNuggets Happy Meal. She allegedly ordered him out of the car, told him that she was never coming back to pick him up and then drove away. The Good Samaritan contacted police who arrived at the park and took the boy into protective custody.

Delasic said the boy’s 23-year-old sister later called police to report her brother missing and was told that he was at the station. She was also asked to bring in their mother.

At the station, Heine, who reportedly appeared intoxicated, confirmed that she argued with her son about the Happy Meals, but that she parked the car by road in order to drink some beer and had only told her son to “go away for a while.” She later realized that he was missing when it started to get dark and had searched for him.

But according to Delasic, officers did not believe that Heine attempted to locate her son. When officers were called to the park they searched the area for the boy’s mother, but were not been able to find her.

Heine was arrested and charged with child abuse and neglect and held on $5,000 bail. The Department of Child and Family Services placed the boy with his older sister.

I usually don’t post or allow large files to be posted on wetwired because I am always wary of bandwidth usage. I have taken a clip of a song from a movie that I’d like you guys to listen to and tell me about what you hear. What thoughts does it bring up? What instruments do you hear in it? How does the composer elicit an emotional response from us, the listeners?

This is only a piece of the song, but it covers the main theme that goes throughout the entire movie. To me, its powerful and very stirring.

in Internet Explorer Right Click and choose “save file as” or “save target as”
Get it here. (note this will only be available for the week.)

Post in the comments if you’d like more information about it, or the composer, but chances are you’ll figure it out.

What I’m thinking I’ll do is post some new music each week, different sorts but more often than naught it will be movie music, ie orchestrated.

Peter Jennings, Anchor and Chief Editor for ABC News, passed away Sunday at age 67 following a battle with Lung Cancer which forced his leaving the anchor desk in April 2005. Furhter information regarding this story may be found at the ABC News website.

Well, that pretty much ends the era of reporting that began in the 1980s with the Big Three- Jennings, Dan Rather and Tom Brokaw. Peter Jennings was always my favorite of the three, and it is truly unfortunate that lung cancer was the cause of death. He was a great newscaster and a better reporter.

Out.

UPDATE: Keith Olbermann, normally just an annoying cable news guy, has come up with easily the most eloquent statements on the life of Peter Jennings in his blog on MSNBC’s website. You can find it here. It’s definitely worth a read.