They need the man to initiate the fun. From Design.

“On the other hand, always taking the role of respondent rather than initiator is limiting to women. This tendency has signficant consequences in sexual relations. Philip Blumstein and Pepper Schwartz, in their study American Couples, found that lesbians have sex less often than gay men and heterosexual couples. The sociologists believe that this happens because, as they found, in heterosexual couples the man almost always initiates sex, and the women either complies or exercises veto power. Among gay men, at least one partner takes the role of initiator. But among lesbians, they found, often neither wants to be perceived as making demands.” -Deborah Tannen, You Just Don’t Understand

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